Everything happens for a reason. I love this little motto that many people live their lives by; most of my teen years were lived by it. If something a bit rubbish happened in my life (I’m talking minor issues here by the way, such as staying out in the sun a bit too long – obviously won’t be doing that again!) then I normally learnt something from it! However, when I first came to university I started to disagree with it. I didn’t really see ‘lessons’ in the silly things that happened. Two years have gone by since then and quite frankly I have never agreed with this saying more in my life.
A lot of you may be thinking that I’m going to write about how having mental health problems have changed my life and how I’m a much stronger person for it. Well…No. Quite frankly I wish it hadn’t happened because it was a crappy 6 months. However, what I am going to say is that this blog has helped me get over some of the problems I was having and I’ve learnt to cope with the ones that are hanging around a bit longer!
I was worried when I first started writing SpottySunflowers because I had absolutely no idea how people would react. I didn’t expect much, in fact if anything it was a really simple way of telling some of my friends what was actually wrong because I didn’t like talking about it. However, little did I know that I would receive countless messages from people (mostly nice!) and that my best friend who’s helped me through a lot of this year would do this:
She was diagnosed with Anxiety far before I was and had always kept it to herself; she told close friends and family. However, now it is out there for the world to see and people have been as supportive of that as they have of me. (Very proud friend right here!)
A private person is something I’m not most of the time, I’m quite open about my opinion on things and I don’t have a whole load of secrets stashed away in my head. I don’t like secrets all that much because I find keeping them so hard. When I started this blog I felt like a weight had been lifted and I didn’t have to worry about people finding out my ‘dirty little secret’ (that’s what it felt like anyway). Seeing as people with Anxiety worry a lot, you can imagine how much easier it was to start dealing with Anxiety once I didn’t have to worry about this! I hope that my friend had the same feeling when she ‘revealed all’ even though we shouldn’t have had to have the weight on our shoulders to start with.
I’m no longer nervous when I sit down to write a blog post. I know that I can write about mental health and I know that people will read it. In fact I know that a lot of people will enjoy reading it. Therefore, whenever I’m having an off day or I just want to be cheered up I’ll sit down and write. If you’ve got a blog then you’ll know the mini ego boost you get when the view count goes up or somebody writes a comment or likes a post! For those of you with twitter, it’s very similar to being retweeted or favourited however a lot more thought, time and effort goes into a blog post than a tweet so the feeling is even better.
I started this blog out of pure frustration at the lack of understanding some people had about mental health problems. However I can now talk about them in person and I know a few others than can to. So I guess everything does happen for a reason.